change one thing, change everything

It's funny how things can change so dramatically in the span of a week. It's amazing how one decision could change everything so quickly.

So basically, my mum's been in the hospital for a week and a half, in ICU for the past week. The solution seemed obvious: I couldn't leave her. Once she told me she didn't want me to go, I made my choice. But so many people were affected, so much money was involved and I was already attached to what my summer was going to be like.

So we're not going to Europe. I didn't even go to Hawai'i.

But, the way I see it, I couldn't really go. My heart would be here, my thoughts would be frantically wondering what was going on with my mum. Just wasn't meant to be. But we will do it one day - PROMISE!

So, my mum's doing fine. She's recovering - slowly but surely. I truly cherish all the time I get to spend with her in ICU - whether it's telling her stories, reading her messages (she can't talk so she writes to us), praying by her side or just sleeping with her hand in mine. I can't wait to see her be more animated, telling me everything she's wanted to say, laughing and being free from all the lines going in and out of her body. I love her. I really do.

Tita Beth (Phils) and Tita Grace (US) arrived today to be my mum's side for the next couple of weeks. When my mum saw them this morning, she was so happy. I'm happy.

Apparently, I can't pull off high-top Converse sneakers. Apparently, it's not me. How is it that we find out what is us? Then, when we do, do we stick to it for the rest of our lives? That's impossible! We evolve, we try new things and when we find out it works, our style is redefined. Heck, if I didn't change my style ever, I'd still be wearing big t-shirts over floral leggings and sandals.

Apart from that, looks like I'm going back to work next week *sigh*

On a positive note, I can shop again!
(a bit more freely after all the holiday cancellation crap is all over)

Oh and question:
How do you judge the closeness of a relationship?

... is it by the depth of their conversation?
... is it by the level of support b/w them?
... is it by how much they tell each other?
... is it by how well they know each other?
... is it by how much they interact?
... is it by how long they've been friends?

Since people are so different. I think every relationship is even more different. I don't think there's any ONE way to judge the closeness of every relationship. I think closeness is measure on the intangible connection scale - and each connection scale differs from one relationship to the next...

Don't know if that made sense at all... but whatever.

Ok Bye!